u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
one two three fourrrrnication!
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
