JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
