Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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