Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
