I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
