Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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