It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
