I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I could fuck to npr.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
