But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
