Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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