i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
