Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
