whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
