Got a toothbrush?
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
