I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'd cum for enchiladas.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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