How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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