Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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