Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
