I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
