A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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