Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
