i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I want a musical about memes.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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