And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
