her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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