It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize
