I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Randomize
