i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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