Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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