I have demons in me.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
