Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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