you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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