No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
