Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
