Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
