u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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