Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
