No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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