Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I hope mine doesn't look like that
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
