i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
