I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
