He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Randomize
