if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
