the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
