Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Randomize
