Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
