Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
