At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize
