none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
