She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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