dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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